Punch Lines

Point of View

This past spring our 3-year-old son, Benjamin, planted flowers for the first time. We gave him marigolds, since they are foolproof.  He loved to see how "his" garden was growing and would often check on the marigolds. One day, as he was showing his cousins the flowers, I overheard him say excitedly, "Look at my miracles!"

—Kathy DeKoter

We have a “swap shed” just outside of town, where people can donate or find good clothing and other items, often like new. One Sunday I saw my little 5-year-old friend sitting in church, wearing the most beautiful dress. Afterward I said to her, “Oh, I do like your pretty dress!”

She piped up, “Me too. My mom got it at the dump!”

—Tina Maris

I was visiting my grandchild Sam in Chicago, who is 7 years old. We were having a conversation when he came up with a rather profound statement. I looked at him and said, “Sam, you’re no dummy!”

He retorted, “Who said I was?!”

—Robert Alles

On a spring break trip to Williamsburg, Va., we enjoyed a ride in a carriage pulled by two horses. Our 7-year-old, who loves horses, was curious when she learned the horses’ names were Matthew and Mark. After the ride she approached the horses and asked them, “Do you have any brothers named Luke and John?”

—Thad and Sarah Roelofs

I was taking my 6-year-old daughter to GEMS one Wednesday evening. As we entered the church my daughter (who reads everything she sees) noticed a sign on a table: “Reserved for Seniors.”

She turned to me with a surprised look and whispered, “Dad, that table is reserved for SINNERS!”

—Shawn Meeuwenberg

A cop pulls over a car full of nuns. The cop says, “Sister, the speed limit on this highway is 55 mph. Why are you going so slow?”

The sister replies, “I saw a lot of signs that said 41, not 55.”

“Sister, that’s the name of the highway, not the speed limit.”

“Silly me,” the embarrassed nun says. “Thanks for letting me know. I’ll be more careful.”

But then the cop glances in the backseat, where the other nuns are quaking with fear. He asks, “Excuse me, Sister, what’s wrong with your friends?”

“Oh,” she says, “We just got off Highway 101.”

—Angela Taylor Perry

Two elderly men who hadn’t seen each other for some time met at the receptionist’s desk in a doctor’s office. One asked his friend, “Are you coming or going?”

The other replied, “If I knew that, I wouldn’t be here.”

—George Hoeksema

A young man hired by a large department store reported to work. The manager greeted him with a smile, handed him a broom, and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.”

“But,” the young man said, “I’m a college graduate.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Give me the broom, and I’ll show you how it’s done.”

—Dick Bylsma

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