Synod 2010: Troll Humor

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A last-minute recommendation came before Synod 2010 to declare that a troll is an appropriate mascot for a Christian college.

As Trinity Christian College’s troll mascot made a surprise appearance, synod chair Rev. Aldon Kuiper said, “If I do not grant the troll the privilege of the floor, I will feel like an ogre.”

Synod heard that the troll mascot was chosen by a former Trinity president and his wife, who searched the dictionary for nouns starting with “tr” to name the college’s new basketball team. “Troll” was defined as a supernatural being: “They agreed that God would need to give Trinity supernatural power to develop a viable basketball team.”

 Other grounds for the declaration: “There is nothing evil about a troll, in spite of what Tolkien may say” and “There have been nocturnal troll sightings by the 123rd Street bridge.”

The minority reporter was booed off the floor after saying, “How can anything so evil encourage anyone?”

 The troll took off his head to speak, and the face of Trinity president Steve Timmermans appeared. “Whether you’re on top of the bridge or under the bridge, this is the place to be, Trollville USA and Canada,” he said, amid cheers from the delegates.

About the Author

Roxanne VanFarowe is a freelance writer who lives in the woods with her artist husband James and their five children in Hillsborough, North Carolina. They are members of Blacknall Presbyterian Church in Durham.