Is Toxic Empathy A Problem in the Church?

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A psychologist at the Nuremberg War Crimes trial, G.M. Gilbert made an observation about the nature of human evil that he had witnessed in the face of the Holocaust of World War II: “Evil is the lack of empathy,” he said.

I believe this quote is relevant to a growing movement within the American Christian church culture today. The issue troubling me is the promotion of a teaching called “toxic empathy.” It is the idea that if we engage or have working friendships with people who have beliefs that are to some degree in conflict with the teaching of Christ and Scripture, that we might be promoting a biblically false form of empathy and toleration: we might be promoting a form of “toxic empathy.”

The Apostle Paul challenges this point of view in his first letter to the Corinthians, writing, “I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world” (1 Cor. 5:9-10). He goes on in verses 12-13, “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. ‘Expel the wicked person from among you.’”

Paul is clearly not endorsing sin within the church but is instead challenging us on the important question of how we are going to bring the good news of Christ to people if the only people we are engaged with are those who think exactly like us. And how are we to engage with the world for the sake of the gospel if we don’t appreciate people from right where they come from? Paul again addresses this in 1 Corinthians 9:23, where he writes, “I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some. I do this for the sake of the gospel, so that I may share in its blessings.” Is this not the very definition of empathy? Can we even be Christians without it?

After all, we all struggle with sin. “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Rom. 3:23) and we are all, in the end, “saved by grace, through faith, and this not from ourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works so that no one may boast” (Eph. 2:8-9). Doesn’t it make sense then that we all treat each other with the same understanding, grace, and empathy that we ourselves had received?

Standing by and with each other, seeking to understand each other is not toxic empathy, it is called Christian love and compassion. Jesus said to us, “A new commandment I give to you: Love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:34-35).

For me, this is the question for Christians who hold to this view of “toxic empathy”: Are we wrong to practice the kind of empathy and compassion found in Matthew 25:31-46, things like giving to the poor, helping the stranger, or feeding the hungry, or loving our enemies? Would doing this be understood as practicing a form of “toxic empathy”? I don’t think Jesus would agree with that! In fact, Jesus says in Matthew 25 just the opposite. Jesus says we’ll be judged by how we treat people. And remember the Good Samaritan in Luke 10:25-37?

For myself, I don’t think our view of the teachings of Jesus should be limited to or interpreted by either the societal or political views of our times. Our witness of the gospel should not be determined by the views of this world at all, but just the opposite!

Our witness of the gospel should always be shaping the world around us. Our Christian witness should always be putting more grace into a world that is deeply in need of more compassion and empathy, not less. In fact, I believe the practice of empathy and compassion for all flows from the very heart of the gospel of Jesus itself.